Sunday, December 17, 2006

gone, there i go


so.. i did it.. i left him.. guess i had it in me after all...

not sure i have much eloquence in me to paint it all pretty though...

and as much as he is holding on to hope, hope is as far as it has ever been from my heart at this moment...

i am all dried up

i thought i had an endless sea of love for a man i now have come to wonder if i ever even knew...

i find myself on the parched bed of a long gone river and i have no tears left to wet the earth

they have fallen through the cracks of my soul, down to the depths of the pain which goes far deeper than i will ever dare to go

i am lost

i am cold

i am alone

and try as he may he is no comfort to me

no comfort at all

i have had to lock myself away for the last three days just to tolerate the air that i shared with him

parts of me escaped at times, and yes i let it slip just how weak i am, but i absolutely refuse to be moved by even the most impressive displays of his motivation or desire.

he has lost me

and that is his fault alone

and i will cry no more



WOW, I will be praying for you my young little friend. Know that Elena and I love you and will miss you.

Posted by Curtis on Monday, December 18, 2006 at 6:36 AM
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mama sara

o sweetie
we're here for you
and praying for you
God bless you and keep you


Posted by mama sara on Monday, December 18, 2006 at 11:12 AM
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Amythyst

You are in my thoughts and prayers sista...

Posted by Amythyst on Monday, December 18, 2006 at 11:13 AM
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Little Steff

Good for you mamakins. Hang in there. We all must trudge the road to our destiny. What dosen't destroy us can only make us stronger. My thoughts and prayers are with you and the girls. Love you!

Posted by Little Steff on Monday, December 18, 2006 at 11:45 AM
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♥christie♥


Stephen and I love you and those babies. We are so sorry. Just sick about it. We'll be praying for you........and being pissed off for you.


Posted by ♥christie♥ on Monday, December 18, 2006 at 1:26 PM
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April

I'm so sorry it had to come to this You did what you felt you needed to do, and we support you in it as you had every right to. We're praying for you and we're here for you if you need anything. Love, April

Posted by April on Monday, December 18, 2006 at 2:05 PM